DUST...
Well The vacation was wonderful.
The getting home was not.
Spending four days away from the nut balls I have for a human family was very nice.
NOT that i dont love my family, HOW EVER, there are members of it that I Dont LIKE. (and yes my bro in law is one of them, please dont get me started)
The current case in point is my grandfather. My mom's dad.
Last night he fell, and bloody well near impaled him self on a deer head.
As a concequence, now mom is in the best mood in the world.
And what dose she do when shes in a lousy mood? Fuss at my cleaning habbits. (you try shareing a room with a heard of cybertroniains and see how clean it stays!!)So now i have to do something that I have to Dust.
This means takeing down all of my dolls, all of my gundams and all umpteen of my transofrmers. NOt a fun job.
I am about three quarters of the way done and i think there's more dust on me, than there is on any of the toys.
Of course as if my day didnt stink enough. As I'm dusting i come across a picture of my ex from college.
It was almost five years to the day that I realized that it wasnt gonna work.
I realized that there were more important things to him out there than me. And that he was jealous of what i thougght at the time was just a toy.
I had never come clean and admited back then that I really DID LOVE Orion. It was just fangirlism then. I guess i cant blame the poor shcemoe for doing what he did.
But it still hurts even now. Standing there in the middle of the campus and yelling for the whole college to hear that NO MAN could ever POSSBILY live up to the ideals of that stupid TOY!
Real heros like that JUST DONT EXIST. And that I would NEVER be happy as long as I held on to my childish fantasy. And as selfish as this might sound the fight had began because I had told him that I didtn want him to and Join the army as his reaction to the september 11th tragedy made him want to. I have seen the results of war burned into my own father's flesh and blood. I wanted to be married to a man, not a name on a wall. Again that fear of loss also going back to Orion.
So though we tried to maintain it for another six months or so, eventually our relationship fell apart.
I just stand there for a long time, feather duster in one hand and photo in the other wondering about him and how he is. I wish him nothing but the best, because thats what I have. I just wish that there was someway to show or tell that it wasnt a fantasy.
I drop the photo back where I found it and go back to dusting, as I hear my mom pipe back up from down stairs and go to see what's up this time.
The getting home was not.
Spending four days away from the nut balls I have for a human family was very nice.
NOT that i dont love my family, HOW EVER, there are members of it that I Dont LIKE. (and yes my bro in law is one of them, please dont get me started)
The current case in point is my grandfather. My mom's dad.
Last night he fell, and bloody well near impaled him self on a deer head.
As a concequence, now mom is in the best mood in the world.
And what dose she do when shes in a lousy mood? Fuss at my cleaning habbits. (you try shareing a room with a heard of cybertroniains and see how clean it stays!!)So now i have to do something that I have to Dust.
This means takeing down all of my dolls, all of my gundams and all umpteen of my transofrmers. NOt a fun job.
I am about three quarters of the way done and i think there's more dust on me, than there is on any of the toys.
Of course as if my day didnt stink enough. As I'm dusting i come across a picture of my ex from college.
It was almost five years to the day that I realized that it wasnt gonna work.
I realized that there were more important things to him out there than me. And that he was jealous of what i thougght at the time was just a toy.
I had never come clean and admited back then that I really DID LOVE Orion. It was just fangirlism then. I guess i cant blame the poor shcemoe for doing what he did.
But it still hurts even now. Standing there in the middle of the campus and yelling for the whole college to hear that NO MAN could ever POSSBILY live up to the ideals of that stupid TOY!
Real heros like that JUST DONT EXIST. And that I would NEVER be happy as long as I held on to my childish fantasy. And as selfish as this might sound the fight had began because I had told him that I didtn want him to and Join the army as his reaction to the september 11th tragedy made him want to. I have seen the results of war burned into my own father's flesh and blood. I wanted to be married to a man, not a name on a wall. Again that fear of loss also going back to Orion.
So though we tried to maintain it for another six months or so, eventually our relationship fell apart.
I just stand there for a long time, feather duster in one hand and photo in the other wondering about him and how he is. I wish him nothing but the best, because thats what I have. I just wish that there was someway to show or tell that it wasnt a fantasy.
I drop the photo back where I found it and go back to dusting, as I hear my mom pipe back up from down stairs and go to see what's up this time.
posted by Roseprincess1 @ 3:17 PM
2 Comments:
At 5:47 PM,
Kenya Starflight said…
Ouch.
Sorry about having to deal with your mom and the reminder of your ex. :P
Hopefully things will improve soon.
I feel your pain on the dusting, though. Keeping my Star Wars stuff halfway dusted off is a real chore. Right now my Vader statues are more gray than black...
May the Force be with you.
At 10:05 AM,
Sith Snoopy said…
Uhm, I tend to let the dustbunnies win. ;)
[Hey, are dustbunnies related to plot bunnies??]
Sorry about your Mom, and your grandfather.
Maybe your grandfather shouldn't have deer heads down low where someone can fall on them? Especially himself? Ouch. Not fun. :P
And sorry you ran into the photo of your Ex. That's never fun. :P
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